Are you having difficulty finding your life calling? Well, you are not alone with many people stressing out on finding that one silver arrow pointing to meaning and purpose in life.
As a young person, you are in a very different place than later in life. But you are confronted with the major decision on whether to take out a massive student loan to train for a particular career path. Finally, you follow through with the predominant view of family and peer groups.
During midlife you find yourself in a very unhappy place, realizing that all those years you had placed the ladder against the wrong wall.
Are you flying or scratching with the chickens?
Friends and family are sometimes the worst people to ask when it comes to pursuing your dreams and passions. The reason is that they don’t want a member of the tribe to change so much that they leave and seek a new tribe that is a better fit for new ideas, philosophies, and visions.
Instead of learning to fly and soar with the eagles, you remain on the ground scratching with the chickens, living out a life of quiet misery. All the time there is that inner voice calling on you to plant that seed destined to make you grow into who you are really meant to be.
It is sometimes necessary to leave a relationship that has long outlived its purpose, an unfulfilling but well-paid job, or even the country you are living in when it comes to living your destiny. Our biggest fear is often the fear that the future might turn out worse than the current situation, so you settle for the status quo because you feel safe in your “comfort zone.”
Life is not a trajectory of predictability
The journey of life seldom takes you on a trajectory of predictability. The ship you are sailing on sometimes has to change course because a hurricane is coming your way. Political systems, institutions, economic sectors, and careers are undergoing huge changes.
A choice might be the right decision now in learning certain skills, mindsets and networking with a particular circle of people. Other times you are getting huge shout-outs from the universe in the form of constant obstacles that are telling you to move on and try something different.
Every choice you make whether it is to fall in love with a certain partner, to choose certain friends, a career, or the suburb or country you live in is based on your state of consciousness at the time. There is, therefore, no need to be too hard on yourself or put yourself under pressure.
A calling can change many times during a lifetime
A calling can change many times over during a lifetime. What you are doing now may only set the stage in preparing and giving you the skillset for the next chapter in your life. You need only to take a step back to have a conversation with your 16-year-old self in realizing how much life has sculptured you into who you are today.
It is the trauma from pain, the effort in finding the answer to an underlying question, a time-out during an illness, an unexpected event that pulls the rug from underneath your feet that catapults you into a new chapter and a new beginning.
But it need not be that way either. Sometimes one event, one chapter just leads into another like a wave washing to the shore. In a 1903 letter to his protégé, the 19-year-old cadet and budding poet Franz Xaver Kappus, Rainer Maria Rilke writes:
“I want to beg you, as much as I can, dear sir, to be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms and like books that are written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.”
Rilke pointedly reminds us that what has broken, destroyed or ripped us apart emotionally are the building blocks of what elevates us to a new level of consciousness and spiritual growth. When all is in flow, the moment arrives when you hear with clarity that inner song, that tune that merges personality with soul purpose.
Reino Gevers – Author – Mentor – Speaker
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